12.31.2004

new year's eve checklist:

tickets to the 80s dance party...check.
champagne...check.
fun new earrings to wear...check.
friends to ring in the new year with...check.
hot boy to kiss at midnight...check!!

tonight sounds like its going to be fun to me!

talk to ya in 2005.

12.29.2004

i cleaned up christmas today. took down the decorations and finished the last cleaning jobs from our holiday party. its so sad to me when my festive house goes back to the usual blah with no jingling bells or twinking lights.

christmas as a ping pong ball actually went much better than anticipated.

my house, his house, my house, his house.

both the donovans and the burpos had a great celebration of christ's birth. i am so happy that i got to spend time with our families and really celebrate the past year. i also had some quality time with good friends- some i hadn't seen in much too long! (you know who you are!)

i really can't believe christmas is already over. i'm so glad i have a few days to relax before i head back to work.

12.09.2004



i read this in my daily devotional a few weeks ago and thought it was great:

Edvard Munch's famous 19th century expressionism painting, "The Scream" has become a universal depiction of the cry of the human heart.

In the painting, the screaming victim is standing on a bridge with a red, swirling sky behind him and two figures in the background. In the artist's own words, the inspiration for this painting came when an unexplainable sense of dread overcame him while out walking with two of his friends. "My friends walked on, I stood there, trembling with fear. And I sensed a great, infinite scream pass through nature."

According to the artist, the two figures have passed on ahead, seemingly oblivious to whatever it was that gripped him with fear. This underlines even more the loneliness expressed. His companions have their backs turned on his desperation. They are no help to him. Only he can hear the scream; and their apparent disinterest makes you feel the scream is silent.

This is not a painting of a human being on a bridge surrounded by landscape; it is an abstract capturing of the human soul. It is a painting of the state of mind that many people are in today. We live in a time of momentous fear, loneliness, & worry, but our screams are mostly silent. Those who could help are walking away. Where are you in this picture?

Lord, make us sensitive to those around us who may be screaming inside. May we not walk on by. And may we face as well, the cry of our own soul and not try and distract ourselves. May our need lead us to you, the one for whom we were made, the only one who can dispel our loneliness and desperation.

12.08.2004

sales can be so ridiculous. i just overheard this conversation between two people on my team:

guy #1 : hey randy! how ya doin?

guy #2 : oh you know, just smilin and dialin.

um..... yeah.

12.02.2004

so i'm not embarrased to admit that i'm going to a therapist to help me prepare for the transition from singleton to old married lady. yesterday as i sat in her office, we talked about my need for 'alone time' and privacy and her advice still has me laughing.

she said...

"you know what i think you should do? you should try and have your own "room" in your house. a room that you can decorate any way you want, and no one else is allowed to come in without an invitation. if you shut the door, it means you want some time to yourself and not to knock unless its very important. you could put a chair and tv in there or a bed for taking naps."

i just had a blank stare on my face...then i started laughing.

anyone who knows my family or has been to my parents' house knows that my dad has this exact room. she described it completely as it exists- full of auburn memorabilia, old photographs, a comfy couch, television, and usually a dog or two.

i am so much like my dad sometimes, i dont even recognize it anymore. and that, my friends, is a scary thought : )