so as i've said on here, i'm homeschooling now.  full time, no training wheels, no joke.  one of the pieces of homeschooling for us was choosing to send the girls one day a week to this absolute gift of a school called 'Earth Native'.  the benefits of Earth Native are layered- on the surface it is exactly what I think kids their age should be doing:  playing in the woods, getting dirty, having an adventure.  it also offers me a great day to get work done and have some mental and emotional space from the girls.

i took a picture right when we arrived on wednesday.  they were clean.  excited.  nervous.

two of the girls have good friends who are also adventuring into Earth Native with us this year and one does not.  that one had me stay for quite a while, but once she was sure i could go, i left!  it was the first time i had left all 3 of them somewhere since May and it was glorious!  i knew they were not only having the time of their lives, but learning and growing AND i had a productive day!!

when it was time for pickup i showed up early (of course) and this is what i saw..... dirty.  tired.  ecstatic.

these are the moments when i just look at those faces and think 'this is right.'  i am so thankful for these three lives and what an adventure this truly is!  i am so so thankful.  for all of it.


time capsule

what a treat it was to have my friend at Janice Reyes Photography create this sweet video of my favorite people. i only cried once watching it and i know it will be a family treasure forever.


school.... again.

so remember when i wrote a post about our decision to send the kids (well just lily at the time) to a university model private school?  i mean i remember that decision making process like it was yesterday.  it was so emotional for me.  i questioned everything.  it felt so serious.

when we first considered a university school i said 'no way, no how' but when the rubber hit the road on actually figuring out kindergarten, i scaled back my personal and work commitments to make it work.  i never thought it would be the right thing for us, but it sure was.  fast forward three years and i would have told you all along that i would 'no way, no how' homeschool my kids.  but here we are.  and i'm homeschooling.

i have had so many people ask me why we came to this decision and there are so many facets of it, that i cannot even figure out how to explain it to anyone else other than that it is right for us.  that i am fully excited and ready for it.  that my kids chose it.  that i know without a doubt it will be a challenge, but that it is the best for our family.

what that means for my friendships and community that i have built over the past couple of years?  i'm honestly not sure.  will i feel completely lonely and isolated?  i certainly hope not.  i just want to love my girls, help them learn, and enjoy some laughs along the way.

so here goes nothing...



i never post here but i read this and i want to remember it.

But if I want my daughter to know how to be a good friend, I need to be the one to show her. I need to treat my friends with respect, with kindness, with the benefit of the doubt. I need to rise above my old and deep-set habit of passive aggressive polite. I need to model friendship on purpose.
It starts with us, moms. It starts with a deep breath. It starts with responding when you don’t want to. It starts with praying over our words before pressing ‘send’. It starts with simple honesty when it would be easier to stay silent. It starts with asking the hard questions and being willing to answer them ourselves. It starts in our kitchens, in our living rooms, on our phones and with our coffee pots. It starts in our own lives and it starts in our own hearts.
I’m putting out a call to be brave. To embrace the sweetness and the depth of real friendship. To hold ourselves to a higher standard than silence. To become the kind of friend we pray our daughters have. This kind of friendship isn’t easy. It’s hard and messy and can come with real heartache. But it can come with richness and love and someone to really do life with, too, and it is so worth it.
-Girl with a blog

"We don't learn to love each other well in the easy moments.  Anyone is good compay at a cocktail party.  But love is born when we misunderstand one another and make it right, when we cry in the kitchen, when we show up uninvited with magazines and granola bars, in an effort to say, I love you"
-Shauna Niequist