when lily was a baby, around a year to 18 months old i remember holding her so tight and wishing with my eyes squeezed shut that time would just slow down and give me more space to relish my amazing child. that i could slow her from changing too much and remember exactly who she was at each stage and grasp at the air to capture the essence of the moments to freeze time.

these days i feel like i would happily tap on the 'fast forward' button were one provided to me. there isn't a lot i feel like reveling in about lily refusing to eat her dinner, crying about being provided the wrong liquid in her cup (but i wanted MILK!!!! not water!!!!), and falling apart any time i leave the room to so much as change my shoes.

certainly some days are better than others, but here we are in the throes of the terrible twos and frankly, i'm over it. i'm having a really hard time finding joy in this situation and my patience typically begins to run thin around 9am.

on the other hand, there is my sweet eve who is beginning to talk (still adorably refuses to walk, preferring to be held), and whose love overwhelms me in so many ways. i know its not fair, but i feel like i am being robbed of the enjoyment of her by the phase that lily is in and honestly i am terrified that eve might ever be as frustrating to me as lily currently is.

throw in the concept of there being three children underfoot complaining about goodness knows what while i try to make them a healthy dinner that they will inevitably refuse to eat... and that about sums up my current outlook on things.

i want to be grateful for the privilege of having these three sweet angels in my care, not anxious. i want to be less easily frustrated by the inevitabilities of a nearly three-year-old's temperment. i want to let each of my children be exactly who they are and guide their character, not their personalities.

i just wish i knew how.

and so i start this day with a prayer for patience that i will likely repeat a hundred times or so.

Heavenly Father, You have dealt gently with Your children in love. You have been patient with me in my humanness and stubbornness.Lord, through the work of Your Spirit, prompt me to be more jubilant in hope, more patient in times of trouble, and more consistent in my prayer life. Teach me, Lord, to wait with faith and expectancy, and may my trials be seen as times for growth in grace. Through Christ our Lord, I pray. Amen.

Rejoice in your hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

Romans 12:12

cute pics of my sweet eve enjoying the sprinklers in our yard on the biz blog- i love how much bigger i can post pics there than here!

go check them out :)

as promised, sweet eve kissing her bunny and talking! ignore the christmas pajamas ;)

night time songs :)

and lily's best quote of the day "mama did you know god made my ears? please don't brush them when you brush my hair. god made them"

sweet eve also learned to 'kiss' her bunny blanket today. i need to get a video of it tomorrow- every time i tried to video it she went nuts wanting my phone :)

it was a gorgeous afternoon with these two bathing beauties. what could be better than this??

well maybe this with a cold beer or a margarita on the rocks with salt, but let's not split hairs ;)

just one of the many many reasons the past month has been truly insane...



we are due on 12.20 with a sweet little baby whose flickering heart made me cry this morning.

run, do not walk, to bonnie berry's blog to see the beauty she found in an afternoon picnic with my family. it was a shoot i had envisioned and somehow she saw it exactly as i knew only she could.

i will also be overly cheesy and admit that i am currently obsessed with the song 'sweet disposition' by temper trap and i feel like it is the perfect soundtrack to her shoot, so if you want to be as cheesy as i am, you can sing that song in your head while looking at the pictures.

with no further ado...

http://www.adventuresoflazygirl.com/2010/05/family-picnic-a.html

and the snapshot of my family (dad, little erin, baby tim, and mom pregnant with me) that inspired the idea

laying in bed about to hit the hay on mother's day thinking about my sweet girls and the joy they bring into my life, i started watching videos of them on youtube and my goodness, nothing makes me smile like they do.

two oldies but goodies that i love watching over and over again...

we had a lovely mother's day brunch at my sister's house this morning with GaGa and her sister, my aunt Patty. yummy french toast casserole, eggs, and pigs in a blanket (just the blanket for me, pass the pigs to lily!)

then we got home and while eve took a nap, lily and i soaked in a bath. she was laying on my stomach with her head on my chest and i said 'i love you lily, did you know you made me a mommy?'

she picked up her head and looked at me excitedly and said 'uh huh! did i make your eyebrows too?'

maybe she'll 'get' it next year... :)

happy mother's day!

sweet eve. my little ball of loveliness has gotten L A Z Y! she is all over the place faster than you can blink... on all fours!! she was such a tease with the excitement about using a walker super early on, but these days she refuses to even try walking much.

who knows when she'll get off her keister and become a biped? i'm kinda getting antsy for it! i hope she figures it out before too long. it sure would be easier at the pool than a crawler! :)

my apologies! i have been a SLACKER lately. in truth i have been insanely overwhelmed, crazy busy, and quite exhausted.

BUT as my mom would like to point out, that is no excuse for leaving you hanging! :)

i have been in dallas since sunday in a photography class and i am ITCHING to get home to squeeze my girls (and my baby daddy). ugh, i just can't wait!!!!