as you may have picked up from posts, i am somewhat of an avid gym-goer.  and by avid i mean that i try to finagle a daily trip into our schedule one way or another.  it is my hour of babysitting, my hour of peace.  or is it?

i tend to gravitate towards the high impact cardio classes.  kickboxing and the like are my poison of choice.  however my need for quiet and a break from my kids' constant chatter has been filled lately with some of the most inane platitudes shouted at me from the front of the class.  i really don't know where the instructors come up with some of this stuff, but i feel compelled at times to either shout 'please be QUIET!' or 'i'm not a deathmatch competitor, EASE UP!'

i started taking stock of the completely silly things they call out during class last week and instead of being annoyed started a mental list to blog.  i'll start with my favorite...

"do you WANT it?  yes or YESSSS??!!"
(i mean i guess i DO want it, but i'm not a child.  i am quite sure 'no' is a viable option)
"we don't want to be SKINNY!  we want to be LEAN!"
(ummmmm.  skinny works for me too.)
"WHY are you HERE?!"
(last i checked i wanted an hour of 'free' babysitting)
"don't you know bathing suit season is HERE?!"
(why yes i do, hence my blouson mommy one piece)
"this is ONE HOUR and you have 168 this week- USE IT!"
(thank you very much, i will now spend the rest of class trying to do the math on how many of those hours i slept this week)


klp said...

i HATE it when they yell at me. almost as much as the overly flowery talk of the average yoga instructor. just tell me what to do without all the jabber, thankyouverymuch! :) all that to say, i feel ya. ;)

and sometimes it's nice to just go down, grab an elliptical and watch "live with kelly" or some mindless gab...haha

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jenny said...

YES!!!! here's what i'm getting (and please, all of them need to be yelled at the top of your lungs):

"are you strong or are you tired? are you strong or tired? when you feel tired, you act like a STRONG PERSON!"

"you have ONE HOUR to get this done. ONE HOUR of opportunity! don't waste it!"

"make up your mind and DO IT!"

"why are you here? why did you wake up this morning? you came here to get something done! so GET IT DONE!"